HIV 101 & Pre-Pink Dot Gathering

A huge thanks to everyone who turned up for my very first HIV 101 workshop last Saturday and I hope you guys enjoyed the pre-Pink Dot gathering too!!

The objective of the workshop is to share basic HIV knowledge with the participants and refresher course for the volunteers. Topics on body fluids, window period , PEP and etc. were being touched on.

Alex Tan

Alex Tan

MSM Programme Coordinator

 

The pre-Pink Dot gathering was a get-to-know each other session where new and current volunteers get to know each other. The volunteers got the first look of the gift that gayhealth.sg will be giving out this Saturday. So all of you out there, please keep a look out for our gift which is coming to you soon!!

Please stay tune for more upcoming workshops and gatherings soon!!

See you guys @ Pink Dot 2015.

Signing off, Alex Tan (MSM coordinator)


 

 

Same Same but…. Different

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He introduced himself through Grindr as Gabriel/28 yrs/5’9/flex and he wasn’t looking for a one night stand. I always assumed that the worst of the guys I would meet will be on gay hook-up apps, unless they proved to me otherwise. Somehow Gabriel seem different, playful but with a straight forward truth when he spoke to me. I had developed a liking for him through every coffee, lunch, movie and dinner date. I found him to be extremely sexy and charismatic, especially the way he would hold my lower back to usher me through the doorway. He was the kind of gentleman I had not seen for a long time, and they say, “Chivalry is dead!” So everything was nice and charming with Gabriel but something was missing. It was 3 weeks of dating, talking, sex texting and good night kisses but no sex. Not even a blow job!

 

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I remembered odd times when there was something on his mind. We would sit in front of each other and I noticed his nervous behaviour. As we walked through Neil Rd, just right before the intersection to Maxwell Hawker Centre, he asked me the question I never wanted to hear, “ What if a guy you like is HIV positive?”. There was just an empty stare from me like a deer that was caught in a head light. I had no idea what to reply at that moment and so I  laughed awkwardly and replied, “Doesn’t matter if he has a big cock”. As I was growing up, I could never filter my thoughts and hence my responses caused me to have verbal diarrhea and it caused him to stare blankly at me like I had shitted in my pants. I wanted to assure him that I understood what he was getting at but I couldn’t communicate my thoughts or words, so I ignored the question and asked him if he wanted Ice Kacang dessert instead.

I want to think that I am a liberal person but I wasn’t quite sure after that night. I asked him to give me some time to process what he had told me. I should really be thankful and privileged that someone had come forth with their most vulnerable secret and shared it with me. Instead I turned the conversation on Ice Kacang. I can’t imagine telling someone that I am HIV positive knowing that the person either can reject me or accept me and from what I see in the community, it will probably be a rejection. I had to seek advice from my best friend who has been my light at every dark tunnel. He asked me “How many guys did I sleep with and don’t know their HIV status, and why this one matters so much?” He is right.

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I do sleep with guys where I don’t bother to ask for their status, which I assume is negative. Why do I need to care so much about Gabriel’s status? I need to see beyond his status and focus on him being a person. But in order for me to do that is to better understand myself and how comfortable I am. There isn’t a quick answer to all these questions because I was raised to not get infected with HIV, and safer sex prevention to stay negative. Now being faced with this tough situation I have to relearn my safer sex practice and how to practice safer sex with someone whom I will share my life with and who happens to be HIV positive.

If you want to know what happened to Gabriel, he broke up with me for someone else. That is another issue I have to work on. Men! They are all the same regardless of their status.

To be continue……


 

 

If you are starting a Serodiscordant relationship (also known as magnetic or mixed-status couples), where one partner is HIV-positive and the other partner is HIV-negative you might want to discuss further with one of our experienced HIV counsellor. Please call our Coordinated Care Support Programme 6256-5903 and ask to speak to Avin Tan our Norani Othman.

If you have had a condom failure or may have recently been exposed to HIV through unprotected sex, you need to see a doctor as soon as possible. CLICK HERE 

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AfA Look Back 2014

As the year draw to a close, we would like to take this chance to look back on a wonderful year, filled with activities, sweat and joy.

So here’s a huge thank you to all our volunteers, members and advocates. We couldn’t have done it without you. Let’s do it (even) better in 2015.

—————

Song – Broke for Free – Night Owl http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Broke_For_Free/Directionless_EP/

Sexually Transmitted Infections(STIs) Workshop

Think you know all the Sexually Transmitted Infections(STIs)? How does it spread ? The symptoms? The stages for infections? The treatments and some even have vaccination to prevent you from getting them?

STIs workshop

 


gayhealth.sg partnered with DSC Clinic on November 27, 2014 for our MSM volunteers and their friends. The workshop was very informative for the participants and many left with a different view of how easily the infections can be transmitted. The feedbacks were positives and some even shared on Facebook about what they had learnt.

“Attended a fruitful session on STDs. It’s very interesting to have a Doctor speaker and explain in more details on STD. Two types mainly, the viruses like herpes 2 and warts which will stay in our body even when symptoms are gone and bacteria type which covers the rest which can be cured. But that doesn’t mean it won’t come back, if u have even a deep kissing of mouth to mouth, you will still get syphilis! So get a regular partner(s) and reduce the risk. Even precum has viruses… Argh.. And your listerene doesn’t blast your mouth super clean after either. Know your risk, play your part.” – R.E

Want to know more about these Sexually Transmitted Infections? Click on the link below for more articles in our Survival Kit!


Missing out on our workshops? Do follow to know our upcoming workshops coming to you soon!!!

A Good Handjob

A Good “Hand Job” is Hard to Find

I remember a very good friend who will regularly caters to all my needs. He would often know exactly when my body starts craving for his touch, even when there is a lack of verbal communication. He knew where and how to get a respond from my body, simply by touching me.

He is the only guy I know who gained great satisfaction from watching another person moan out in pleasure or scream out “oh my f-ing god” when he rolled his oiled palms on their naked back. If you thought I was talking about something else; then, sorry to disappoint you, but I was talking about getting a good massage.

A good masseuse is hard to find, yet receiving a good massage is one of the richest, intimate, human connection two people can share. Often we forget how another person’s hands can relief us from the stress in our body.

So, we conducted a massage workshop last Thursday (7 Aug 2014) and 16 turned up for this unique, kinky yet safe event. Participants were given a short crash course on simple massage techniques and were sent off in pairs , so they could practice on their partner.

It was very interesting to observe how (with much shyness and giggling) as the group started to introduce themselves, and their body to their partner. Yet once the lights were dimmed, the room went silent, and every one focused on delivering the best they could. Towards the end, everyone was relaxed, and comfortable with themselves and their body to mingle and share their experiences with the group and trainer. If you missed this workshop, be sure to connect with our FacebookTwitter or bookmark gayhealth.sg and receive updates for future workshops.


 Here are testimonials from the participants:

“Thank you for initiating and leading this workshop. It was a great learning experience. I found it very well conducted, engaging, and enriching. I’ll definitely apply what I learned there. Looking forward to the next workshops”

Zaki

“The trainer’s candor and professionalism made it easy for us to let go of our inhibitions, and I learned a lot about myself- such as that I’m pretty good at giving massages, it seems. :)”

And

“I feel certain that these new skills will stop my boyfriend from cheating on me.”

D.G 


 Upcoming Workshops

gayhealth.sg maintains all rights to these content

If you see a content that should not be here, a photo of you that you would like us to remove, drop us a mail with the link or title of the photo. All participants on our websites are our supportive allies and does not necessarily reflect their sexual orientation.

MEDIA: Please contact us for permission to use any content.

Dining in the Dark

By : Yee Jun Ming

Last evening’s ‘Dining In The Dark’ conducted by SAVH was a most interesting and fun experience.  

We were introduced about the association and then briefed about the dinner event. Then we were slowly led into a dark room and to our seat at the table where it was completely pitch black, total darkness. 

 

I was beginning to feel claustrophobic and uncomfortable from the lack of vision but told myself to calm down and relax. We realised that without sight, we were somehow talking louder. Strange. Haha.

Then I orientated myself, finding out who was seated beside me “Stop touching me, Daniel! I already told you Gabriel!”, I said giggling; and I felt around the table setting in front of me; mentally taking note about the placements of things.

We were then served a bowl of delicious mushroom soup. How did I know it was mushroom? It was luringly aromatic. Haha. I held the bowl in my hand and thought to myself ‘Ok, how are you going to do this, Gabriel? Spoon it or sip it from the bowl? Well no one would know what you do.’ Haha! So I placed the bowl down on the table and felt for my soup spoon; and I carefully spooned the soup and successfully placed it straight in my mouth. ‘Yes! I did it!’, I thought to myself. Haha. But then hearing that others are sipping their soup from the bowl, I decided to follow suit. Haha! Strange experience, without sight, I was actually able to fully enjoy the soup and taste every delicious bit of it. I finished it with much appreciation. Just as I and a few others were done with our soup, we were told that they’re going to serve bread which would go very well with the soup, ‘Damn, I just finished my soup. Guess I have to eat the bread on it’s own’, I groaned. It’s okie. Haha. 

The server cleared our empty bowls and then served our main course. I chose a tomato-based vegetarian spaghetti. Again, I felt around my plate to orientate myself and then thought to myself ‘Hmm… How do I eat this without creating a mess? I wish I chose chicken chop instead, just poke with a fork and eat it straight.’. Haha. But being vegetarian, there was no other option. However, after hearing how difficult it was for some to eat their chicken chop ( which came with coleslaw and mash), I was glad I had a simple spaghetti. Hahaha. Carefully twirling the noodles with my fork and the aid of a spoon, I ate slowly and carefully, keeping in mind not to make a mess; and constantly wiping my mouth with the napkin. ‘Glad I’m wearing black’, I thought to myself. Haha. When I thought I was done with the noodles, I used the spoon to scoop around the plate to make sure I finish the sauce too. I really wanted to show my appreciation by making an effort not to waste any food. And the funny thing was, without sight, it didn’t bother me at all if the food looked appetising or not. I just happily ate what I was given. Haha. There’s a lesson to be learned. Haven’t quite put it to words yet. Haha. 

We were told that our plates would be left at the table so we can later see how we faired. Fun. Haha. Eating in the dark felt alright by now. I placed the fork and spoon nicely on the plate and waited for dessert to be served. 

Ice-cream! We could smell strawberry-flavoured ice-cream, then some tasted chocolate. It was kinda exciting. Haha. “Mine is strawberry!”, I exclaimed gleefully. But half way through, I tasted chocolate. Haha. Then a friend said “Must be Neapolitan!”. Hahaha. And some of us decided to lick our ice-cream goblet coz no one could see us anyways. lol 

Then coffee/tea was served. Again, I carefully held the tea cup and saucer from the server and placed it next to my empty dinner plate. We were then told that sugar and creamer would be passed around and I thought to myself ‘Oh dear. How am I going to do that? Maybe I should just have my tea without sugar or creamer’. Haha. But then I thought I should challenge myself and see if I can do it with ease. So I took a sachet of creamer (no sugar for me, that’s how I like my tea. Really. Haha.), tore it open carefully and poured it in my tea. Gave it a few stirs with the teaspoon and then showly sipped and enjoyed my tea. Everything was done with extra caution and calculation. Haha. 

Oh there was water and juice which we had to pour ourselves if we wanted. We had to pass the jug around and when pouring into our glass, we were told to stick a finger in the glass to gauge how much we poured. I did it without spilling. Yaay! Haha.
When the whole dinner was done, they turned on the lights and we could all see how neat or messy everyone was. It was hilarious. Some had food and spills all over the place. Haha. But I was proud that I did well. See attached photo, not bad eh? Kekeke. 
By the way, the servers were visually impaired. Big kudos to them for being able to serve all of us without hiccups. They’re awesome! 

The whole unique experience was a very fruitful one for me. I had a great time with old and new friends. I was reminded not to take things for granted and to be more appreciative. An evening of blindness was really interesting and fun, but a lifetime of blindness is a different thing altogether. Living in a world of darkness can be rather scary and dangerous. It takes great courage and a strong and positive attitude for a blind person to live through daily. I have much admiration for them. And I feel very blessed to have all my senses working. Very grateful for the experience. 
You should all go experience it too. Do your bid for charity, for them, for yourself.

 


 

First published on The Bear Project Facebook page on July 26,2014

 


gayhealth.sg maintains all rights to these photos

If you see a photo that should not be here, a photo of you that you would like us to remove, drop us a mail with the link or title of the photo. All participants on our websites are our supportive allies and does not necessarily reflect their sexual orientation.

MEDIA: Please contact us for permission to use a photo.

HIV Refresher / Movie Night

To all the participants who made it to our HIV refresher course, a huge thank you.

The HIV Refresher workshop that was conducted on Saturday July 12, 2014, was meant for us to learn from each other through knowledge sharing and it addresses topics such as basic

HIV knowledge, understanding the steps to reduce the risks of getting HIV and HIV testing.

Many people regard HIV/AIDS with much fear and our workshops aim to dispel some of these myths associate with it, making the topic, approachable, and manageable. One of the interesting question that got everybody confused was “Having many sex partners increases your chance of getting HIV even though you are using condoms.” The answer to this question was not meant to be straightforward, true or false, but to let us reflect on the preconceived notion of people who have multiple sex partners.

Sometime it just takes one partner to be infected. The social judgement prevents people from having open dialogs about sex, preventive measures and HIV. Yet sex (for most) is an integral part of the community and gayhealth.sg being a sex positive platform and thus, we believe that it’s not how many, but how you have sex that counts.

We ended the workshop by watching a Hong Kong film about a couple who have to make tough decisions about their relationship when one got infected with HIV.

Our result: 15 participants with over 95% increased basic knowledge of HIV.

Connect with our Facebook or Twitter and receive updates for future workshops.

Related Link


gayhealth.sg maintains all rights to these photos

If you see a photo that should not be here, a photo of you that you would like us to remove, drop us a mail with the link or title of the photo. All participants on our websites are our supportive allies and does not necessarily reflect their sexual orientation.

MEDIA: Please contact us for permission to use a photo.

Potluck Gathering

The event was held on Saturday June 14 2014 for our volunteers and guests. We were very please with the turn out and managed to show our new guests about one aspect of our programme. We hope to make this potluck a regular event for the MSM programme volunteers, and for new members to be introduced to the programme and organisation.


gayhelath.sg maintains all rights to these photos

If you see a photo that should not be here, a photo of you that you would like us to remove, drop us a mail with the link or title of the photo.

MEDIA: Please contact us for permission to use a photo.